Special Thanksgiving Day

Today is a day to give thanks. All too often, today is looked at as the door to the Christmas season. This morning I can't sleep as always when taking the chemo. So, true to form, my mind always starts thinking. This is my second round of chemo after my last post and I wanted to start with the "This is what I am thankful for" list first.

I am thankful to be alive and have the time to spend with family and friends.

I am thankful to everyone who cares to peek in on my blog to check on me.

I am thankful to have been raised by a dad who taught me to be a good person. Dad I miss you very much everyday.

Dad, I, and large elk in the background - Yellowstone 2011

I am thankful that I have caring and loving people around me to get me to and from my chemo treatments. For today would not be possible without them.

I am thankful that my symptoms are fairly predictable and I can lead a somewhat normal life. I will eat a lot of great food today even though I have my chemo bag strapped on.

I am thankful that my friend Eric came to visit with me for the holiday. I really cherish this tradition and want to say thank you to Michelle who let him spend this weekend with me even though it would be their first Thanksgiving together as a married couple.

I am thankful that good friends will come over and watch the Utes game on Friday, where we will yell at the TV and give high fives. GO UTES!!!

Most of all, I want to be thankful, that my wife and daughter keep it real for me. They cry with me, they make me smile, they snap me back to reality when I really need it, and they always give me as many hugs and kisses that I need to make it through each day.

I always get asked about how I feel, and  wanted to let everyone know that I feel great. I feel as normal as I have ever felt, and except for whats inside me, I couldn't be convinced otherwise. I feel like I can do all the normal things I want to at anytime. By the way, I am thankful for that.

I hope this Thanksgiving Day will be special for everyone, newborn (congrats Mark and Angie) and older.

As always thanks for reading and caring,

Jeff

PS - Here is the picture of the chair I bought at the new infusion center. Just kidding, its just being leased to me.

Life throws curveballs.

Just when we thought we have had the worst week ever, the blows just keep coming. Friday, I went in for a pre-surgery petscan and the results were not good. The tumors in the lymph nodes which previously were inactive are now highly active and I may have a new one infected. This makes surgery a mute point as the cancer would just spread into the liver and that makes the surgery an unnecessary risk. It's back to chemo to try and stop the tumors from spreading further. I will get started hopefully this Friday or by next Friday at the latest. As long as the body stays healthy, and the chemo does its job, I can be a candidate for surgery again. We'll just have to be hopeful.

This cancer roller coaster keeps getting tougher. It brings out emotions and stress that are hard to contain without hurting someone. If you know someone who has cancer, give them a hug and tell them you are thinking about them. Tell them you love them if you do, it really means a lot.

Thanks for reading,

Jeff